in a lot of pain with no end in sight

In a lot of pain with no end in sight

I woke up around 0630 with my foot hurting. I took some pain meds and then made coffee. I wanted to go to the Museum of Fine Arts today but that isn’t happening. I also wanted to take my jeans with the broken zipper to be fixed but that isn’t happening either. I heard a crash downstairs and when I rushed to check on my mother, pain was all that I felt. I am fucking miserable.

I guess low key activities are in order today. I will be reading the article I want to blog about sometime today provided the two pain pills I took doesn’t leave me higher than a kite. I had to take 2 because the pain is just so severe. I had taken one about half an hour ago and the pain got worse when I went to lie down. I want to nap but it just doesn’t seem that is going to happen. The pain is just throbbing so damn bad. I fucking hate when I wake up with pain because I have no idea if it is going to get worse with me moving around or not. Seems that moving around is not a good thing to do today.

I also plan on reading some more of the Robert Lowell book. I have like 9 chapters left to read so I am getting there. I am half way through Huck Finn and a friend gave me a book about Maya the bee or something like that. That is on my next book to read list. I don’t know when I will read Dostoevsky. I still haven’t finished Brothers Karamazov. I am close to finishing that one but it just drags on and on. If it was a regular book, I could see my progress but it’s on a Kindle so I have no idea how long the chapter is or how much more I need to read. Very frustrating.

I have another headache today. I think the new pillows are hurting me. One already got flat and the other is big and fluffy. I haven’t decided which one I like better. Neither helps my ankle/foot/toes pain. I am just in a bitter mood today. I haven’t had breakfast yet. I’d like to make pancakes but that doesn’t seem like it’s going to happen either. I had a donut and a fiber one bar with my coffee, but that was like 3 hours ago. Maybe I will wait a little and make hot dogs. Sox game is on at 2. I have no idea who is pitching. I haven’t seen the lineup posted, though I haven’t been on Twitter much today. They lost last night.

It’s a good day today, 64 degrees. I hate that I am cooped up inside because of pain. Maybe if the strong pain pills work and don’t knock me out, I can go and get my jeans fixed later this afternoon. Just sucks that I am in fucking pain. I hate it. It just stresses me out. Starting to feel the effects of my meds. Better go make some hot dogs before I pass out…

One thought on “in a lot of pain with no end in sight

  1. hope you enjoyed the hotdogs. the pain must feel awful! I have no idea what its like to feel chronic pain but I imagine it feels desperate and you feel so stressed over it. I really feel for you. Sending you hugs and support I know it seems like I’m always saying that. sometimes I wish I could do more. xx

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