Finally a good session with my therapist
I woke up in pain and that set me off in a bad mood. I didn’t want to have therapy because I was dopey from the pain meds and I knew she would annoy me. Sure enough, within the first five minutes she was already on my bad side. I told her I was still waiting to hear back from my psychiatrist regarding the bed. I had emailed her this morning telling her I was feeling shitty because I woke up in pain.
I didn’t play the question game with her because I was just annoyed and angry. I don’t know where the anger was coming from, probably because I wanted to go to Harvard Square and I couldn’t because of the fucking pain. Instead we talked about my PTSD, which she was lively about because it’s her favorite subject. I told her my insights as to why I get anxious and we talked about that. It felt good to be understood finally about my being in pain and how it makes me feel useless and out of control at times because it’s never predictable. I am always on edge and she understood that.
After therapy, I took some more pain meds. I am somewhat pain free right now but I am very tired. My mother is making chicken cacciatore and it smells so awesome. I can’t wait to eat it. My mother is going to call me soon as it’s done. Chicken cacciatore is one of my favorite dishes that my mother makes.
I got no sympathy from my mother, surprise surprise, that I was house bound today. She thought I wanted to get another burrito but I really wanted my espresso and to get a new calendar. She said I could make coffee at home but I didn’t feel like making it today. I finished off my cranberry muffins. That has been the only thing that I have eaten so far today. I think I will make some boiled eggs. I am really hungry.
Before therapy, I took some Neurontin because I was feeling nerve pain on and off. I didn’t take that much, just enough to cover me until tonight when I can take more. It’s really making me drowsy. I think I will sleep before making something to eat.