Two chores done!

Two chores done!

I needed to change my sheets and take a shower. When I woke up, I didn’t want to do a damn thing. I sort of made plans with a friend to come over today and when he texted me, I almost cried. There was no way I was up for company. He understood and he sent his hugs so that made me feel a little better.

I then started clearing off my bed and took off the dirty sheets. I brought them downstairs and threw the comforter in the washer. Then I wrestled with the fitted sheet using the clips I bought to keep them on my bed. It was easier putting the clips on my sheet than tucking them under my mattress. I think I did it right. We’ll see. I had to rest when all four corners were in. My back was killing me. I rested for a few minutes and then put the other sheet on and the pillow cases for the pillows. I was thinking of going to the Square but after I took a shower, my ankle is really hurting so it’s not happening. I don’t even think I am going to go to the liquor store for beer. Even though I just did two things, I am in a lot of pain.

I made some lunch and then snacked. My mother will be making dinner soon. I don’t think I am going to eat it. Maybe later in the evening. By the time I was done having lunch, my comforter was done in the dryer. I brought it upstairs and put it on my bed. Now I want to hide under the covers but my sleep has been off the past few days. I am going to try and not sleep until later tonight. I really want to try and go to the Square tomorrow so I can get some more turkey breast. I ran out. I really love making the roll ups with cranberry sauce. It’s like my favorite thing to make because it is so easy. I also love making the tortilla into a burrito with eggs for breakfast. I also need to get more eggs as my mother has just one dozen left. I want to make cookies this weekend. It won’t be tomorrow but maybe Sunday or Monday.

I am feeling really dowsy, like all the energy has been sucked out of me. Maybe I should make some coffee. It’s still early for a cup. But I have a feeling it will be like taking a sleeping pill. If I don’t drink it, oh well. I am going to try it. I need to stay awake as I have been sleeping all morning. I hate when my depression makes me so tired. It sucks.

Published by

G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality

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