I went to sleep early but that didn’t help keep me asleep all night. I woke up several times. Then my med alarm went off. I took my meds. Then slept on and off the next couple of hours. I needed to shave and shower. I wanted to be up around 11 so I could possibly have breakfast. It was pouring outside and my mother had all the windows and doors closed so it was a sauna in the house. I went downstairs with a change of clothes which was dumb as it was way too hot to change. I was sweating after my shower, even after drying off. I grabbed my clothes and cooled off in my room. Then went downstairs to eat something. I decided to have cereal. I put too much and it was making me feel sick. I went back to my room.
I wanted to leave around 1430 but I couldn’t wait that long. I left at 1330. I checked on my niece to see if she ate. She did. I then packed by bag with just what I needed and then left. Rain had stopped. I was waiting at the bus stop when my cousin came. He drove me to Starbucks. I was grateful. I don’t think I could stand another 10 minutes waiting for the bus as the bench was wet. My ankle was already starting to act up. I got my espresso and was just in a pissy mood. I thought about getting something to eat but I really wasn’t hungry. I was still full from the cereal.
Around 1500, I left for the train. Someone had fricken urinated in the elevator. I reported it after my stomach wasn’t going to empty. The smell was awful, especially in the heat. It was cool on the train. The sun had come out but I didn’t bring my sunglasses. Oh well. I was early for my appt. I watched the Brazil/Belgium game. Belgium looked like it was going to win. They called me in the last two minutes of the game so I don’t know for certain. I had a new fellow who was a complete moron. I told him I wanted to increase my pain med dosage because the flares were awful. He said we can’t just do that. Instead they are going to increase my breakthrough meds. They didn’t give me 60 count, just 45 but the dumbass didn’t change the order so the pharmacy wouldn’t fill it for 45, just 30. I was so fucking heated. Again I wasn’t fucking heard. Now I got to call Monday and the order changed. The fellow also pushed PT, like it was a cure or something. I told him to write the order and I will go but if I am in pain, I won’t go. He didn’t know how to order it because he was knew to the system. He came back with the scripts and the PT order. I left but I couldn’t make an appt as there was no one there to do it. The office staff had left for the day. They will call me on Monday. Not if I call first.
It was hell trying to get home. There was some kind of problem at Harvard. I waited for three trains because they were full. I knew I wouldn’t be able to stand the whole way. Every stop we had to wait 5-10 minutes. A lady left and I took her seat. Then a guy with a shirt too small and his belly sticking out kept kicking my bad foot. He was doing all kind of weird moves while looking on his phone. No idea if he was playing a game or what. I had to tuck my foot in so he wouldn’t kick it, which caused my calf to cramp. Asshole. He got off before my stop. I missed the bus so had to wait another 20 minutes or so. I had decided to order Mexican food. I was so done with today. It took me almost and hour and a half to get home. Ridiculous. Then my meds were too soon to fill. And the other one was fucked up so they couldn’t fill it anyways. UGH!!! Just made my fucking day.
I wrote to my psychiatrist about the idiot clinic. I don’t care anymore. I know she can’t do anything but at least she knows what is going on. I am tempted to cancel my appt with her in a couple of weeks. I really don’t feel like seeing her. If she responds to the email I sent her, I will see her. If she doesn’t respond, I won’t be seeing her. That will be the deciding factor.