blah and tired

Blah and tired

I had my appointment with my neurosurgeon this morning. We talked about the MRI results. I do have a leak but it isn’t something major. It is medium size so we are just going to monitor the headaches and see if the steroids help it. He wants me to increase activity but slowly. Just taking one walk per day and resting the rest of the time as I need to be careful with my back. I didn’t ask him about more PT sessions. The PT that I have been working with that I don’t like is coming tomorrow. I hope she doesn’t work me too hard because that will be bad. I honestly don’t want to have PT but I know I need it.

After I had breakfast and my tea, I had to give myself my T shot. The first injection didn’t go well as it felt wrong and sure enough it was. I hit a vein and there was blood. UGH. I didn’t inject in that leg I used my other one. I had to. I didn’t want to risk another venipuncture. The second injection went smoothly and I didn’t even feel it. So yay for doing it right, the second time. I was sleepy afterwards so I decided to take a nap and then I would shower and then go to the pharmacy to pick up my meds. That was the plan anyways. It didn’t happen because I woke up at 3 and was too tired to leave the house. I did take a quick shower. I also shaved my face. I had to because I was starting to get stubble again. I want to be clean shaven for a while, though I still have my mustache.

I ordered food for dinner as I didn’t want to cook anything. I was supposed to get a milkshake with my order but I didn’t. I was sorely disappointed. I had asked the delivery guy about it and he just kept on saying no. Jerk. I wanted that one sweet thing today. I have been in such a blah mood. Pain hasn’t been helping my mood at all. I have been having bladder cramps the past hour or so for some reason. I hate them. They feel like period cramps. I took some Tylenol for them though I know that probably won’t help any. I’m feeling really low right now and I don’t know why. It came on so suddenly. I feel like I shouldn’t be around anymore. That has been my feeling for most of the week. I didn’t think I would get back to these dark moods so suddenly but I have. I guess the affects of the anesthesia have worn off now and I am back to my depressed mood. It was good having a little respite from it. I hope I sleep tonight.

any thoughts?

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