Tag: baseball

Saturday Blog 3-Feb-18

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

I had a decent sleep, the first in about three weeks. I had a little pain when my med reminder alarm went off this morning. I took some pain meds. I didn’t get out of bed and I don’t remember if I went back to sleep or not. I know I got up around 10 after deciding to order breakfast from McDonalds because I didn’t want to waste spoons. I really wanted to change my sheets today. I had breakfast, made coffee, and while drinking it, I finished my baseball history book. It was the first book of the year I read. I think I am going to read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows next soon as I find where I put it. I have both hardcover and paperback. I like reading the hardcover but if I can’t find it in my stacks of books, I will read the paperback. I know where that is.

The baseball book wasn’t really what I was looking for. It was nice to know the history of the origins of game I love and how it flitted between organizations until the 1900s. It didn’t say when baseball created MLB as an organization, though it did say that the National League and American League were formed. However, it didn’t give the names of the teams and cities. It was frustrating because it would say the city names but not the team names at the time. For example, the oldest baseball team is the Cincinnati Reds. They were created in 1869 as the Cincinnati Red Stockings. Boston was formed in 1871 and also called the Red Stockings. It was called the Americans and Bostonians before they officially became the Red Sox around 1901. New York Yankees (which I call the Snakes, Skanks, or Skankees) weren’t formed until 1901 as the Baltimore Orioles (no relation to today’s Baltimore O’s) then became the New York Highlanders. I think it was around 1913 they became the Yanks, but I could be wrong. The Giants were formed before the Skanks and was based in New York before moving to California where they are now the San Francisco Giants. I really would love a book that has the history of the teams but isn’t made of stats or players names. The evolution of the game was great with this book but left me wanting more. I do have a Red Sox history book that a friend gave me for Christmas one year. I need to find it so I can read it.

I was tired after I finished the last chapter. I didn’t want to change my sheets but I forced myself to. I cleared off my “office”. I just put the crap in places where they wouldn’t fall. It will somehow accumulate back on my bed. Right now I just have my laptop, tissues, Kindle, and reacher on my bed.

Losing my mobility has been the hardest to accept. I’ve been asking myself if I am trying too hard or not trying enough to be the person I was before I was disabled. It is a tough position. I’ve accepted my mental illness since I realized I would always need medication for it if I was to survive but being physically impaired is very tough. Don’t take what you can do for granted, ever. You never know when you will lose it. Enjoy those walks

New Year’s Day 2018

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

New Year’s Day 2018

Happy New Year’s to all my readers. Hope your year is full of good things.

I don’t really set any goals as I am so bad in keeping them. But if I were they are the following:

• Lose weight, 20 pounds and I will be happy
• Read more books
• Spend less time on social media so I can read books
• Watch at least 5 movies that I bought so I can wipe the dust off them, LOL

I once again set a reading challenge on GoodReads. I hope to read 25 books during the year. I have started two new books, Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman and a baseball history book by John Thorn. I miss baseball very much and I have always wondered how the game got started, what the rules were, etc. Just in the introduction I learned that the game originated around 1839 in Cooperstown New York. There is also is another town in Pennsylvania but it didn’t last long. I am excited about reading it.

It’s another cold day. I woke up around 0930 and it was 1 degree. It is now around 10 degrees, so warmed up a bit. It is very bright out as the sun hitting the snow is glaring into my room. I may have to pull the blinds down. I want to get new blinds, the kind that are vertical not horizontal. I just have to measure the width so I can get them. I have the hooks on the frame of the window because the space inside where you would normally put them is too small. I also need to get a new curtain rod as my drapes are too heavy for it. One of these days I will go to Target and get it. I might have my cousin take me. He doesn’t mind because he likes to talk to me and smoke in the car as I don’t mind it.

I just posted a recipe that I like to try. I got to buy the cheddar and butter to make the biscuits. They are supposed to be really good. I love biscuits and have always wanted to make some. Hope they turn out good.

My brother in law made a pot of chili yesterday for the party. I went downstairs to get some and other food for my mother. When I finished eating and then went up to my room, my ankle gave out. Now I am stuck on my bed. I am in so much pain. I also been having waves of dizziness. I hope it is not a side effect of the new med. I didn’t sleep too well. I was up every 3 hours or so. It sucked. I don’t know what I am going to do about the ankle pain. I might have to take a strong pain pill. I took the regular pain meds a couple of hours ago. I just want to watch some shows that will distract me. I might take a nap first.

running around continued

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

Running around continued

I got the zipcar this morning and went to the Social Security office. I should have looked up the address before leaving but I didn’t. I drove right by it, twice. I waited about an hour to be called. There was some traffic on the way home. My mother wanted me to stop and get her some stuff at the grocery store. She wanted deli meat and bread. I also wanted to see if I could find a 9×9 or 10×10 pan. No luck. So I went to Stop and Shop as I still had some time to kill before returning the car. They didn’t have it either so I settled on an 8×8. I then returned the car. As I was walking home, my ankle was hurting. I had to stop at Walgreens to pick up my scripts and of course there was a line. The regular pharm tech wasn’t there. My ankle wasn’t happy to stand. By the time I got home, I was hurting really bad. I am still hurting.

I had overnight oats for breakfast. It was okay. There was only one kind and it had coconut in it. I love coconut shavings but not really the flavor. While I was at the grocery store, I bought lunch, some buffalo chicken wings. I should have bought two packages. Oh well. It was really good and not too hot. I am hungry now but going down the stairs is going to hurt. I emailed my PT to see if maybe wearing a boot will help as any movement really hurts, weight bearing or not. I got to keep my ankle/foot immobilized in order to stay pain free. I only hesitate to wear it because it knocks my hip out of whack, which then hurts my back.

I got into a low mood last night and emailed my psych that I was done. I was giving up. Monday would be our last appt. It might change but it might not. I don’t know. I hate being ambivalent but it’s the nature of the beast. My mood kind of sucks right now. I am in a lot of pain. Meds have taken away some of it but it’s still always there. I know I will never have zero pain, even with the meds. But I want them to take more than just the edge off sometimes. If they can bring my pain to my baseline, that would be great. It really sucks that I had to decrease my Zoloft due to side effects. I feel it helped me cope with things better.

Big goings on with the Red Sox today. A lot of their coaches have been hired by other teams since the firing of John Farrell. They have name a new manager, Alex Cora, who used to play with the Sox. I like him and think he will be good for the team. Just stinks he has to hire new coaches now as well as to get to know the players. I really would love to see Jason Varitek as their pitching coach. I love Varitek when he played our catcher. He is so very handsome and a good player that was classy and knew the game well. I miss seeing him every day. I follow his wife on twitter as he doesn’t have any social media accounts. The Skanks fired their manager today. I am not surprised as he really wasn’t producing for them. They made it to the playoffs but didn’t win any pennants. Not that I feel bad or anything. I didn’t like him, but only because he played for our rival team. I honestly don’t know anything about him like I do their other manager, Joe Torre. I respect Joe. He is one of a kind.

another disappointing season

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

Another disappointing season

Sox just lost their final game of the season. I am disappointed and frustrated. I am also depressed that I won’t be hearing about the Sox until February when pitchers and catchers report. Just another year of frustration.

I woke up around 4 in pain. In addition to physical pain, I had nerve pain. I took a dose of Neurontin with my pain meds and then tried to go back to sleep. I did and didn’t wake up till after 1300. I wasn’t in too much pain but I took my pain meds anyway as it was getting close to the 12 hour mark and I didn’t want to go through withdrawal.

Now that the ball game is over, I plan on taking a shower. I will be going to the courthouse in the morning and I don’t want to take it as I might not wake up in time. I have my alarms set for the week. I like that I can choose a day to set an alarm rather than picking a day of the week. I don’t know if I will be able to sleep as I am pretty nervous. If I wake up before 6, I am just going to stay up as I know if I go back to sleep, it’s going to be hard to wake up when my alarm goes off.

I made coffee and something to eat today. My pain is not too bad right now, but that could change after I shower. I have been trying to take it easy today to not cause a flare. I’d really hate to miss the courthouse and have to wait another time to change my name. I have waited so long for this to happen. I don’t know how quick it will be.

I’m kind of stressing over this week because I have appts every day. I think I am going to cancel the PT appt for Wed and then just go Friday. I need to make the appt for Thursday with the neuro. I have waited much too long for that and I don’t want a flare to keep me up all night.