busy Monday morning

Busy Monday morning

I had a shitty sleep. I fell asleep sometime after 0200 only to wake up around 6 because my foot was in severe pain. I took my pain meds and slept until my alarm went off. I didn’t want to get up but I had to be at the dentist office by 0800. I dragged myself out of bed, got dressed, brushed my teeth, and headed out. I had to wait until the dentist was available to see me. He said that I had severe inflammation of the gums but wasn’t too sure what was causing it. He wanted it to go down and for me to finish my antibiotics before taking x-rays.

I left in time to catch the bus to the Square. While I was waiting, I called my PCP’s office to see if my prescription was ready to be picked up. It was. I had breakfast at Starbucks. I ordered a snickers latte rather than espresso. I felt like treating myself to something good. I had 6 espresso shots. It was stronger than I thought it would be but still good. I went to my PCP’s office after I finished and then went to the pharmacy. My foot was in severe pain by the time I came home. I hadn’t taken any pain meds with me and the last time I had taken them was around 6 this morning. I was overdue. My foot was also on fire so when I came home, I took my pain meds and Neurontin. I also rinse my mouth out with the antibacterial rinse. It doesn’t go well with powerade but I can’t take the Neurontin with water because it is gross. Guess it was the lesser evil.

I wanted to get my meat sauce for supper but my mother is making lazy man lasagna. I will save it for another day. It’s not going anywhere. I have been wanting to have it with penne pasta for a while now. I haven’t had lunch yet. I will finish off the White Castle burgers. That should tie me over until supper time.

I am going to try and stay up but I have a feeling I am going to take a nap. I am really tired from all that I did this morning. I was out for 4 hours. I am glad I don’t have therapy this afternoon. It would suck. My mood sucks right now. I am just exhausted from hurting and not sleeping. I am so tired of waking up in severe pain. It’s really mentally exhausting. The hard part is that I have absolutely no control over it. It flares up whenever it wants to whether I am sleeping, trying to sleep, or just plain resting.

My fricken bowels are going nuts. Whenever I have Starbucks milk, it seems I am intolerant to it. I don’t fricken care because I have been backed up the last few days but the cramps are horrible. I just hope I don’t have an accident because that will kill me. I also hate having to go up and down the stairs a lot because of it. I so wish there was a half bath where the bedrooms are.

I’m trying to make plans with a friend that I met while in the hospital. Every time I ask when to meet up, she is vague or doesn’t answer. I really don’t want to go out tomorrow, except to Walgreens because idiot me forgot my strong pain pill script to get filled today. I had it on the edge of my bed so I wouldn’t forget it but I did. I also need to mail a birthday card for a friend of mine. Maybe I will get some pizza when I drop off the card to the mailbox, though I have been thinking of getting a pastrami sub lately. I love pastrami.

One of my blog readers suggested I get input for the blog about therapists who shaft clients for the suicidality or hospitalization history. If you would like to contribute, please email me at Collerone at Yahoo dot com or use my contact page to send me a message. I’m still mulling over ideas for it so you have time to also contribute if you would like. Please get it in by this week though. I’d like to write it up by the weekend. I think it’s important to get the word out that there are therapists and organizations out there that just don’t want to deal with severe mental illnesses.

About G. Collerone

suicide attempt survivor writing about the hopelessness that accompanies depression that no one likes to talk about. also writing about my daily struggle with chronic pain and how it affects my suicidality
This entry was posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to busy Monday morning

  1. G. Collerone says:

    Yes it does. And it is getting worse

  2. manyofus1980 says:

    an old post here but I thought I’d reply. your pain has a mind of its own. I’m sorry it flares so often and you never have a choice in when that is. sending hugs to you. xoxoxo

any thoughts?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s