Baking day and subsequent pain
I didn’t have a good night sleep. I woke up around 0330 and then every few hours. I kept on waking up in weird positions that were hurting my back. Then I woke up on my back and it was hurting. I got up because I had to use the bathroom. I then decided to make breakfast. I wanted to make cookies but I wasn’t feeling up to it yet. I went back to my room and my ankle was flaring. I didn’t do much to set it off, but then, you really don’t need to. I took some pain meds and waited for them to kick in. Once they did, I went back to the kitchen to get started on the cookies.
I baked okay. It was the first time making chocolate chip cookies. I was using my mother’s recipe. Only thing I can critique is that I didn’t space the dough on the pans out more. The cookies stuck together. I separated them after they cooled a bit. They tasted pretty good. My foot was aching and I was wicked tired. I needed a nap.
I napped for a couple of hours. I had a strange dream I was playing basketball at the place I did when I was a teen. I missed a shot and the ball hit the backboard. The ball flew almost over the fence but didn’t. I was tracking it down like a centerfielder. Unfortunately, the ball rolled under the fence where it was just enough space for it to roll. I went to grab it and it was like a toy grave yard. There were toys all over the place. I wanted to get my ball and continue playing but I woke up before I got my ball. I sat up when I woke up and that set off foot pain. It hurt really bad. My med app went off telling me it was pain med o’clock so I took my pain meds. My mother wanted me to wash the dishes. It wasn’t going to happen.
My mother called me asking me when I wanted dinner. I said I was in flare and wasn’t hungry. She hung up on me. Whatever she was making smelled good. I carefully stood up and it wasn’t too bad. I went downstairs and my mother was making pasta and some eggs and asparagus. I had some of each. Then my mother and I chit chatted. She got up to go in the other room to watch TV and she said I was to clean up the kitchen. I told her I was still in fricken pain. It doesn’t go away just because I rested. I wish it did but CRPS doesn’t work that way. Once you flare, you are flared! She pissed me off. She wanted me to put away the pans I used for baking and something else, so I said ok. There was no way I could stand to wash dishes. I could barely sit as it is. I asked her if she wanted a cup of tea before I left the kitchen. She said yes. So while the water was boiling, I put away the pans, which was a bitch because there was a cooling rack in the back that prevented the pans from going where they needed to. I had to get on my knees to get the stupid thing.
I brought my mother her tea and limped my way up the stairs. As I went up, she asked if I put away the pans. I said I did. Bitch. My foot just hates me right now. But the cookies were worth it. I was planning on making some cookies tomorrow but my friend, who I ordered an apron from, is mailing it out to me and should arrive some time next week. She wants me to post a pic of something I made with it. After making these cookies, I won’t be baking again anytime soon so I told her I would wait for it to come in. The dough and the cream cheese will stay good for at least a couple of weeks. I still haven’t figured out how to cut the dough as that is not my thing. I have to cut it in 20 parts and place it in a muffin pan with a well for the cream cheese mixture. It looks easy on the video, but might be difficult when I am doing it. We’ll see. I just hope I don’t burn them. That will suck.
I wanted to take a shower after I napped but pain prevented that from happening. I really want to shower as it has been days since my last one. Damn pain is making things impossible. I am going to try anyway. Pain seems to have settled down, some, while I was writing so maybe now is the time. I never know. I might hurt more but it’s close to bedtime so I don’t care.
Saturday Blog 26 August 2017
I woke up around 8ish. My foot was being crushed and my bladder needed to be emptied. I played with my phone for a bit and wanted to go back to sleep but knew if I did, I wouldn’t go out to the meat shop. I checked to see when the next bus was and it was at 0915. I got dressed and then went to the bus stop. My mother didn’t hear me leave. She never does.
I got breakfast at Starbucks and wrote for a bit. Then I checked when the bus home would be. It was in about 40 mins so I left to do some shopping. I had to get eggs and my ground beef. The meat market had the ground beef on sale so I got a big package as that was the only way to get the special price. I didn’t want to get 4 pounds but whatever. I’d use some and then freeze the rest.
I called my mother when I got to the bus stop waiting area. I told her I got the eggs and she said she was calling me a mouse from now on because she didn’t hear me leave. Whatever. She asked how much the eggs were and then called me a “good girl” for getting two dozen. I cringed. She wanted me to get chicken wings but I told her I had already left the store. The chicken breast was too “expensive” and she was glad that I didn’t get it. For some reason, it didn’t look right to me so I didn’t want to get it anyway.
I came home and put the stuff away. I’m always super careful when I buy eggs because I can be a bit of a klutz. I have broken one too many eggs in my lifetime because I wasn’t careful. I took out some butter for making the chocolate zucchini bread I plan to bake. I was going to make it yesterday but was too tired. Today is still cool so I can turn on the oven. Shredding the zucchini is going to be fun, I hope. I bought four because it calls for I think 2 cups packed. It also calls for a lot of chocolate. YUM! I bought dark chocolate. I hope it comes out good.
I’m listening to Taylor Swift because I am in that kind of mood. I’m still on the fence on liking her new song. I don’t know what to make of it. I know it will grow on me if I listen to it enough. I can’t wait for her new album to come out.
My laptop screen is really going. The glitch problem is getting worse. I can only have my screen a certain angle to have it clear. I am so annoyed. I got to get in touch with my friend to find out how much a new one is going to cost. I hate to buy a new laptop when everything else on this baby is working fine. I eventually need to upgrade Microsoft office but I’ll do that when I feel like it or buy another laptop. I will get two licenses so I can put it on this laptop and the new one. Sucks that they will only allow a licensed copy on one computer when the software costs so damn much. No more sharing of CDs though I think now you just download the software. Most new laptops don’t have a CD drive anymore. Pretty soon they will be obsolete like the 3 inch diskettes.
I’m going to make Manwich for lunch. It will be my meal for the next few days because I am the only one that likes it. I haven’t had it in a long time.
Cold day but I’m hot
It was hot in my room, even with the ceiling fan and window open. I decided to empty my recycles as they were getting a little out of hand. It’s been a while since I took them down to the bin we have. I had to use a big trash bag and I was sweating by the time I was done putting all of them in. My back was killing me too from reaching to grab those that I threw but missed the bin that I have in my room. I don’t know why I bother throwing them. I miss 90% of the time.
I had made breakfast before I got dressed and did the recycles. Unfortunately, I had spilled my juice because my hands were greasy from the bacon and the glass slipped from my hand. I had to wash the floor so it wouldn’t be sticky. I was cursing because I should have wiped my hands before reaching for the glass. Oh well, live and learn, right?
I plan on making my Nantucket Cranberry cake today. I can’t wait as I love making it. I have the cranberries thawing out as they were frozen. I am going to take a slice to my psychiatrist on Friday. She hasn’t had it yet. My mother told me she will be making pork fried rice. I am NOT looking forward to it because the pork is almost a week old. YUCK. I might just eat the rice and skip the pork.
My pain is minimal today. After breakfast, I went to Starbucks to have my espresso. I put in the soy milk like I always do and unfortunately, it curdled so I couldn’t finish it. I ended up getting a caramel macchiato so to have caffeine. I am wired. I should have complained so I could get a free drink but I hate making a fuss.
I had a hard time writing in my journal while I was there. I just couldn’t get going. I only wrote about a page before I ended up leaving it to catch the bus home. The bus was a little late in leaving but I didn’t mind. I was listening to Record year on repeat. I had to listen to it because I heard a Chris Young song that made me think of my therapist and that just got me missing her. I still haven’t heard back from the therapist I called yesterday. I hope she calls me today though it’s getting later so maybe not.
While I was at Starbucks and thinking of stuff to write, I ordered a new foam topper for my bed. The one that I have is falling apart as it’s more than 10 years old. It also doesn’t really support me the way it used to. I hope the newer one works just as well. I was going to get a gel foam topper but I heard gel can cause you to heat up and I hate feeling hot. I went with one that was under $60 so I hope it’s worth it. I also ordered RENT cd to replace what I have. I seemed to have misplaced disc 2 and I really want to hear it. Watch me find it after getting the new CD. Isn’t that how it usually works?
I was talking with my cousin who has depression. She is having side effects from her medication and her psych put her on a brand new med. I am weary about switching and I warned her about potential side effects from my experience and what I read from the prescribing information. It’s a med that will not be right for me because I don’t do well with SSRI’s usually. Zoloft is the exception. I have been on it for a little over a year and it hasn’t made me sick, yet. I get occasional nausea but I think it’s because of post nasal drip/allergies. I need to use Flonase more often to keep it from happening, especially with the blooms that are going to be happening. The trees in my neighborhood I am allergic to and will sneeze my head off if I smell them. I don’t know what kind of trees they are but they form white flowers before they turn to leaves. The flowers give off a scent that I am allergic to. I hate flowers anyway but these kill me every year. There is a new antihistamine on the market that I am thinking of switching to as the Allegra just isn’t working as well as it used to. I am going to try it and see how it works for me. It is expensive though, like all new drugs are. Maybe I can get a prescription for it. I will ask my doc when I see him. I still have a close to a full bottle of Allegra so want to use it up before I switch.
A sleepy and painful day
I woke up around 0330 with my ankle in agony. This is the first time in a long while that pain woke me up from a sound sleep. I took my meds and couldn’t settle down. Then I got my second wind so decided to take some Ativan to get back to sleep. I didn’t fall back to sleep till around 0700 or so.
My mother was visiting my aunt and called me a few times while I was sleeping. This interrupted sleep really made me groggy. I finally got up around 1100 and made pancakes. They were good. I wanted to do the dishes but I felt tired so I went back to sleep. I slept on and off for the next couple of hours until my niece came home from school. I let her in and she went downstairs. It was around 1500 and I still didn’t get a call from my PCP’s office about my prescription. I called and they now have it ready for me.
The therapist I called yesterday called me back. He isn’t taking anyone new. I kind of figured as much. Seems every therapist I call isn’t taking new clients. He told me to go to Psychology Today’s website to find someone. I said thanks and hung up. I felt defeated. There is one more place I can call before I totally give up hope. I will call tomorrow.
I got a big headache when I went back to bed after I let my niece in. My head just felt so damn heavy I didn’t want to move. My ankle was acting up again so I took some more pain meds and some headache medicine. After more than an hour, I still have the headache and no energy. My mother thinks I sleep all the time. I have tried telling her that I don’t but she doesn’t believe me. I give up. Let her think what she wants. I made a cup of tea and did the dishes in the sink while the water was on to boil. I didn’t make coffee today because I didn’t feel like having it.
The pancakes have made me so full that I haven’t eaten anything else today. I am not hungry, yet. I still feel groggy and weighed down. I should have stayed up rather than go back to sleep again. I’m going to try and take a shower later but I don’t know as my foot/ankle are really hurting. If not, I can always take it tomorrow morning. I have a few errands that need to done tomorrow so I hope I wake up before 10.
Looks like ibuprofen and tea helped my headache. I still feel kind of tired. I hope I don’t wake up in the wee hours of the morning again, though usually on pay day I do. If I do, I will order my groceries before the website goes down for a few hours. I would like an early morning time for delivery on Thursday. This way here, I can make my Shepard’s pie for dinner that night. I plan on cooking meats and stuff the next few days. I want to make my “dirty” gravy so I can have it with penne pasta. Gravy is just the Italian version of a tomato sauce. I don’t know why we call it gravy but we do. I also plan on making my Nantucket cranberry cake. I want to use up the cranberries that I have in the freezer. I love this cake. I plan on making it next week so I can bring some to my psychiatrist when I see her on Friday. If there is gravy left over, I will also give her some. Usually my gravy disappears because my family loves it so much. I don’t plan on making a big batch as I only bought a pound of beef. I might add meatballs but that might over do it. I also bought steak so I will have that one night. I will be a cooking machine next week. Hope my ankle can keep up!