Tag: chronic illness

Good day in a long time

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

Good day in a long time

I had a low pain day. I timed the bus ride to the Square right and got my Starbucks. Then made my way to the commuter rail with just enough time to buy my ticket for the train and wait for my friend. I brought two bags with me as one just wasn’t enough. It turned out okay. We got to my friend’s town around 1400. We waited a while to get settled and then around 1500 or so, I went to work. My friend was out of oil so we had to wait till his wife came home. Luckily she thought of appetizers because it would take a couple hours for the sauce to cook.

We watched Popeye while the gravy was cooking. It was with Robin Williams. I had forgotten most of the other characters in the cartoon as it has been ages since I last watched it. I kept on going back and forth to the kitchen to stir the gravy and eat appetizers. I didn’t have lunch so was kind of hungry. By 1745, everything was ready. My friends loved the sauce and meatballs and raviolis. This was the first time I made them and the raviolis came out perfect. We had dessert afterwards.

Then we watched my favorite movie of all time, Money Pit. I knew it word for word, almost. I must have watched it a million times with my childhood friend. It was our favorite movie. It still cracks me up to this day. After the movie, my friend’s husband took us home. There was a lot of construction and changes in the Boston area where my friend lived. It didn’t help that there was a game at the Boston Garden so cars were leaving the parking lots. It was a nightmare. Then I took the wrong road going to my house as they had changed things. I should have known better but we turned around and went the right way.

My pain is still kind of low though throughout the cooking and stuff, I had to rest in between. While we were eating it really flared up and I knew there was no way for me to go home via public transportation. I had a really good time with my friends. We laughed and had fun. The kids loved my gifts. I was glad. It was the first time in a long time I felt good. I kept up with my pain meds and wore my compression brace until I couldn’t stand it any longer. I just hope my pain doesn’t get worse as the night progresses. Right now my foot is angry but that is okay. It was a long day of wearing socks so I think it just got irritated with them on. Luckily, I didn’t have to wear my boot. I had brought it just in case. I really came prepared and I think that helped to relax me so I didn’t have to worry about a flare. It really helped to focus on having a conversation with my friends and focusing on the cooking or watching a movie.

Now I just hope I can sleep before the pain awakens.

birthday 2017

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

Birthday 2017

My mother made pizza for dinner. My immediate family came over for my birthday. It was nice, even if my youngest sister was being a goof the whole time. She gave me the body pillow I wanted though it is not as supportive as I thought it would be. My 2nd youngest niece painted a Winnie the Pooh bear. It was cute.

I tried making the cheesecake cookies today but the cookies didn’t come out the way they were supposed to. They are still edible and I supposed I could use the cream cheese filling as a dip of some sort for them. I was disappointed. My mother said I didn’t cook them long enough. I don’t know. They seemed okay to me.

I had some pain throughout the day. After I made the cookies, I took off my boot to relax and the pain got so bad, I cried again. I couldn’t help it. I had been walking around the kitchen doing stuff and guess it was too much for my ankle. I am hurting now as I am writing this. There just doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason for the pain. I don’t do anything, I hurt. I do something, I hurt. I hate this condition so much.

Protected: dark thoughts running through my brain

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders, suicide

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strip it down

by Midnight Demon, posted in Bipolar Disorder, blogging, chronic physical pain, depression, mood disorders

Strip it down

I’m listening to Luke Bryan and this is the song that is currently playing. I couldn’t come up with a title so thought I would use the name of the song. Corny, but it works.

I went food shopping today. I didn’t get much as I didn’t have that much money on me. I just bought the bare essentials until next week when I get paid. We were out of juice and that was the important thing. Always need juice in case my mother’s sugar goes down. I got a little of this and that. Then caught the bus to the square to get an espresso. I also treated myself to a cranberry bliss bar. Those are so good. I haven’t had one in a couple years. They only come out during Christmas season. I then hurried to catch the bus home.

I wrote a pitch for my second book and submitted it to a mental health press. It will be a few weeks before I know if they will print it. I had no idea if what I did was right as I never submitted a pitch before. I was really tired after writing it up. I went to nap and then my mother called just as I was ready to drift off to sleep. I was robbed of a nap. I didn’t want to get up. I wasn’t that hungry but I went downstairs. My mother made pasta for me as I wanted some. She made asparagus and eggs. I had a little of it while the pasta was cooking. She made it really al dente. I am not a fan of al dente. I ate it and now I am super full.

It has been snowing on and off today but now it’s snowing pretty steady. It’s supposed to snow till Christmas morning. Don’t know if that will happen. We haven’t had a white Christmas in years. It would be nice.