Another depression episode is coming

Another depression episode is coming

Yesterday I was starting to feel symptoms of depression. Feeling worthless, everyone hates me, loss of appetite, feeling guilty over nothing, etc. Today I felt more of the same as I was riding the bus to my physical therapy appointment. I just didn’t want to go. I thought it was pointless. I just feel so tired. My legs hurt because I had to make a lot of trips up and down the stairs today. My brother in law needed to be let in because he forgot his keys. Then my mother had a nurse come. I was so aggravated. I just wanted to sleep.

I got to PT and the PT notices my swelling has gone down. I hope so because I have been icing it a lot. Not I got to work on the muscle to help bring it down more. That hurts. I have one more session with her before the Pain Program starts. She said that I could come back if I needed to for anything PT related. I said okay. I know there will be something I will need PT for. And she is a good therapist. I like her a lot.

I had to wait for the bus back to the station. It was really cold out and the wind made it colder. I had my music but there was nothing I wanted to hear. I have like 2,000 songs and I couldn’t decide what to listen to. I was listening to Pearl Jam and I love listening to their music when I am in a bad mood but this time, I wanted something else. I looked over my playlist and there was nothing to suit me. I ended up taking my headphones off and trying to snooze on the bus.

I came home. My new OtterBox came. I also went to Walgreens and picked up some stuff for my roommate. I hope that solves the problem. I also need to clear the area where the window is so my brother in law can take the AC out. I don’t think we are going to have an Indian summer. It is going to be cold the next few days. I think days of shorts and T-shirts are over. I hope my brother in law puts in my screen for the window. I like to keep the window cracked a bit so my room doesn’t get too hot. I had to do that last winter and it worked. I didn’t overheat. I like my room cool anyways.

My thigh is pretty sore from where I gave myself the shot. I had to put a lido patch on as it was really sore after all the stair climbing. Red Sox won last night. It was another nail biter but I slept through most of it. I kept getting messages about it, which kind of pissed me off as I was trying to sleep. I didn’t want to put the do not disturb on as I wanted my alarm to wake me in the morning for my meds. I actually woke up before the alarm this morning, which was good. I didn’t have to leave until 1215 to catch the bus for my appointment.

I made the Guatemala coffee. It was strong and bold. I really liked it. Wish I had time to finish it but I didn’t. I had some of my pumpkin cake for my breakfast. I have half of it left. If I remember in the morning, maybe I will take some with me when I meet up with my friends. They may like it.

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